How long should sex last? Honestly?

SEX! How long should sex last? What is the magic number? Honestly? This is one of those questions that you may have asked yourself when you were in your inexperience days or even in your more mature days. If this question was asked to a woman verses a man, the answer could be dramatically different and we know why. The funny thing is that it is very unlikely to get an honest answer. Everyone thinks the higher the number is the better. People will add a few minutes to their magic number to make sure it sounds good.

Men like the feeling of hitting a home-run and have become pleasers compared to earlier years when men just did their business and did not aim to please. In today’s time, men actually care and want you to have multiple climaxes. Men that make a women climax multiple times feel like they have put in work, work, work, work, (in my Rihanna voice) and they have achieved their goal.

Honestly what is the magic number? Do you include foreplay into the equation? I have asked 8 of my married/single friends and the answers were as follows and man some of my friends had me raising an eyebrow or two:

 1: 10-15 minutes of foreplay 30-40 minutes of intercourse

2: 0 minutes of foreplay (not a fan of foreplay) 45 minutes of intercourse

3: 30-1 hour (or if someone climaxes before this time) 20 minutes of intercourse

4: 15-20 minutes of foreplay (if they are good at it) 20-30 minutes of intercourse

5: 5-15 minutes of foreplay 15 minutes of intense intercourse

6: 20-30 minutes of foreplay 15-20 minutes of intercourse

7: 10 minute of foreplay 10 minute intercourse

8: 15-30 minutes of foreplay 45-2 hours of intercourse


After taking this survey from my open and willing to share friends (thanks you all know who you are). I jumped on the internet and googled the same question and was shocked by the answers I found. Of course, the numbers varied slightly but the numbers were much lower than  my “freakazoid” friends…Lol


What do the experts say?

In 1948 a biologist named Alfred Kinsey wrote Sexual Behavior in the Human Male and he stated that 75% of man climaxed in 2 minutes. Yes, I said that right 2 minutes!  Now if this is true then I guess none of my friends are average.  This number I am sure has change because again men actually have more of an interest in pleasing the ladies and therefore they “usually” want to make sure she gets hers before he gets his. Back in the day men in the 40’s didn’t care about pleasing her it was all about him. So seeing this 2 minute man is believable.

In 2012 some researchers from University of New Burnswick in Canada did a study. They asked both men and women to time intercourse in the privacy of their own homes. From an average the researchers determined that foreplay lasted 11 to 13 minutes and intercourse was 7 to 8 minutes. Well it looks like the numbers got better over the years but my friends are still in their own category.

Dr. Brenden Zietsch did a study with 500 couples from across the world. Couples were to time from the moment penetration began to the moment the man reached his climax. What was funny about the study is that the men had higher numbers than the women reported back but they were in the same session….ummm interesting there goes that man’s ego again. The numbers that were provided ranged from 33 seconds (poor lady) to 44 minutes (whew I am tired just thinking about it!) From these numbers Dr Brenden Zietsch got an average of 5.4 minutes. Now when you look at that number you think wow 5 minutes? But this was an average that was developed with all age range of couples.

After looking at this data it is safe to say there is not a magic number for how long sex should last. I know if you are single and casually dating it is very different from married with kids and sneaking in sex in between feeding the baby. Whatever your number is as long as there is satisfaction from both parties than that is all that matter who cares about how long it lasted.  If you are watching the clock you just are not into it anyways, are you?

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